For the rest of your life, remember to love yourself more.
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those who are soft-hearted live the hardest.
when others ask for help, they sympathize with others when they are lost. They would rather endure their own hardships than see others feel aggrieved. But when you pay for others, who will cherish you.
who will take care of your feelings when you are foolishly humble to others?
when you walk in the world, you still have to keep a little ruthless strength.
No matter who you get along with, whether you meet by chance or your best friend, you should always keep in mind that your heart can be soft, but the bottom line should be high and the principle should be strong.
in this way, your efforts will not become cheap.
after my friend Xiao Xiao graduated from university, he shared a house with his classmates.
the two get along well at first, but the longer they get along, the more obvious the contradiction becomes.
her classmate interviewed for a long time but couldn't find a job.
Dress to impress in our collection of long sleeves evening dresses. Allow to be served with the coolest tastes available.
Xiao Xiao understands each other's difficulties. Except for the rent, he is responsible for all the water, electricity, food and oil at home first.
and agreed to pay it back when the other party got his salary.
usually order takeout and drink milk tea, Xiao Xiao will also bring one to her.
at first, the girl symbolically assumed the responsibility of cooking and cleaning, but within two days, she quit.
Xiao Xiao cooks and washes dishes like a mother after work every day.
although there is dissatisfaction, because of affection, forget it.
until one day, Xiao Xiao was on a business trip for three days. As soon as he opened the house when he came back, he was shocked by the chaotic scene.
the garbage can is full of takeout boxes and the sink is full of unwashed dishes and chopsticks.
now the rustling can't stand it at last.
send the previous bill for more than half a year to the other party and prepare her to move out.
I didn't expect that girl to complain first, and there were a lot of rumors in the circle of friends that she was so unkind and stingy that she had to figure out the money for a cup of milk tea.
Xiao Xiao burst into tears after seeing it.
after listening to her crying, a friend said:
"how dare you be a good man in the future? If you help everything and give in to everything, others will not think of you as you, but will only think you are stupid.
"
this is not pleasant to hear, but it is very reasonable.
remember that classic line from the Godfather--
A soft heart without boundaries will only allow the other party to gain an inch; kindness without principles will only let the other party do as he pleases.
soft heart is a rare and valuable quality, such people are mostly kind and pay attention to feelings, but no matter how soft they are to a person, they should put their own interests and feelings first.
otherwise, your sincerity will eventually become a loss of "as bitter as Coptis chinensis".
people who are soft-hearted are too kind.
is precisely because of kindness, can not be cruel to others, but also reluctant to refuse others, even if it is a legitimate refusal, they all feel that they have done something wrong.
but it is precisely because their efforts are too unreserved that they are not cherished by others.
I have seen such a supermarket experiment.
shoppers
was asked to taste a kind of chocolate cookie, and when they were given cookies from a full jar, they said it tasted good.
when they were given cookies from an empty jar, they said it tasted better.
in fact, the cookies in the two jars are the same.
this experiment illustrates an interesting point in human nature: people tend to think that the rarer things are, the higher the value.
in fact, the same is true of feelings.
if you give everything, what you give away is worthless.
although people's hearts are mutual, not all efforts can be exchanged for the same amount of return. Sometimes, the more you dig your heart out, the more the other person will attack the city and land.
the more graciously you flinch, the more justifiable the other person will be.
because he knows that no matter how he responds to you, you will continue to hold out all the cookies.
therefore, to be a man, you should be like that "empty" jar and give with reservation.
people who are soft-hearted are most likely to be looked down upon.
because soft-hearted people don't like to argue with others, even if their own interests are infringed upon, they can change the story with a simple apology.
over time, you become the unimportant person in everyone's eyes.
being hard-hearted will win more respect.
the protagonist Jack in Brokeback Mountain marries Lulin, the daughter of the town farmer tycoon. Lulin's family is rich and famous locally, while Jack used to be a cowboy show.
because of this, Lulin's father doesn't like him and often targets him.
Jack has refrained from making concessions for many years in order to maintain family harmony, but his "always patient" attitude has not won the understanding of the other side.
one year on Thanksgiving, the whole family had dinner.
at the dinner table, the son was obsessed with watching the ball game and didn't concentrate on eating, so Jack turned off the TV. Unexpectedly, Lulin's father sang a different tune with him again.
he strode over to turn on the TV and said, "
eat without eyes. Boys should watch football.
"
as a result, the two men deadlocked in this way, with the front foot closed and the back foot open, and the rear foot opened the front foot.
after two confrontations back and forth, Jack broke out: "
this is my house, he is my son, you are my guest, now sit down.
"
unexpectedly, when Jack showed the harshness of the owner of the house, Lulin's father was meek like a lamb, silent.
as the writer Yu Hua said:
"when we treat the world fiercely, the world suddenly becomes gentle."
it is good to have a compassionate heart when you are alive, but only if you add a little "ferocious" background to this softness so that you will not be fooled.
be a man, not
can be too soft.
living in this world, we are all the same people, no one is nobler than the other, no one is humble than the other. You don't have to force yourself to make the other person comfortable, nor do you have to compromise for the sake of false peace.
the really good relationship is that you take a step back for me and I give way for you.
to be too soft-hearted is to connive at each other's progress, and to care too much about others will only make you aggrieved.
remember to love yourself more for the rest of your life.
be true to your heart, take care of your feelings, your kindness, your heart, don't hold it out, slow down and leave it to someone who is really worth it.
encourage each other!