The ancients used to say that no desire is just.
Frequency
-01-
when I first came out to work, I shared a rent with my friends.
We used to have a good relationship, but after a long time, contradictions are inevitable.
for example, in diet, I like light, but my friends are not spicy; in work and rest, I like to go to bed early and get up late; my friends like to stay up late and get up late; I like to be quiet, while my friends are noisy.
I have been instilling my idea with him, telling him to shake the quilt when he gets up in the morning, because some smells and sweat of the human body should not be distributed in the folded quilt, and bacteria will grow over time.
A friend suddenly said, "Don't be so fastidious. I have to sleep at night anyway."
this kind of triviality is innumerable, there has been communication, but not much effect, a long time, and returned to the original appearance.
at that time, everyone was unhappy, and it was even more difficult not to look down every day.
then I figured out that everyone has a different way of life, and since they can't change other people's minds, change their own attitude.
if you don't like it, just do it again by yourself. If you think about it, you'll feel much better.
A writer once said: "A person's character determines a person's fate, if you like to maintain your character, then you have no right to refuse your fate."
Life has always been the coexistence of beauty and misfortune, with indifference and closeness.
when our habits and ideas conflict with others, we might as well lower our expectations so that we can neither embarrass others nor torture ourselves.
-02-
chatting with colleagues, she said she was divorced and her tone was so light that she seemed to be telling other people's stories.
my ex-husband and I went to college together and fell in love for two years before we got married.
during this period, our relationship is very good, the wedding is also very beautiful, which has earned me enough face.
We are still in love after marriage. after an unexpected pregnancy, we discussed and decided to resign, and he also said that we would work harder to earn money in the future.
when I was in a bad temper during pregnancy, he also coaxed me. "I really thought I had found a good husband because of my virtue in my previous life."
now I know that tears after marriage are all in the brain before marriage.
for a time, he got off work later and later, texted back more and more slowly, and often came back in the middle of the night, asking whether he was having dinner with colleagues or working overtime to catch up on the project.
later, a friend told me that she went out on errands and saw my husband shopping with a woman.
I had a fight with him when I knew about it, and he knew he was wrong, and he was very kind to me during that time.
after the baby was born, our life gradually returned to peace, but I forgot that cheating is the same as domestic violence, there is only a zero and countless differences.
I have washed my face with tears for countless nights and lost more than 20 jin, but he saw it just like nothing happened.
after this, no matter how late he is busy, I won't keep pressing like Rip, knowing that his heart is gone, what else is there to miss?
after giving up, I feel more relaxed than ever before. I began to try to get started in my previous job, taking care of my children and recharging myself at the same time.
We went through the divorce formalities a month ago.
now that my parents take care of the baby, I am beginning to return to the workplace. I believe everything will be all right.
after listening to her story, I thought of an article I read a long time ago:
A man was holding a beautiful bottle when suddenly it broke.
were feeling sorry for the man, and the man left without even looking.
when someone asked him why, he said, "Why should you miss a bottle that has been broken?"
Yes, what is lost never really belongs to you.
very often, when women get divorced, they are really not afraid of anything, but they are afraid of hurting their children.
anyone who can control his own destiny has never been afraid of divorce and can afford to lose.
joys and sorrows are only momentary; gains and losses are only temporary.
instead of letting yourself meditate and not live in peace every day, it is better to tie a knot to your heart, seal the past, and only seek comfort and comfort for the rest of your life.
-03-
I went to Sudan for a period of time a few years ago because of job transfer.
there, I made a group of warm and sincere Sudanese friends.
Sudanese are happy by nature. They sing wherever they go, pay attention to letting nature take its course and let things go.
and I have always been impatient. If something happens, I may not be able to eat dinner.
I have asked my friend in Sudan about this question.
he said such a sentence at that time:
"We are happy because we pursue less and let go more. We thank the blue sky overhead and the earth under our feet, the rising sun every day and the bright moonlight at night, every wisp of wind and every cloud. "
later on, I think that the reason why people suffer is that they pursue too much, but they can hold very little.
Life is originally a cocktail. It can be colorful in color, bitter in taste and sweet in taste.
since sadness is a day, and happiness is a day, why not take the initiative to embrace happiness?
in many cases, if you are forced to feel unhappy, you might as well try "forget it".
always like to recall, like nostalgic people, doomed to live a bad life.
A Brahmin brought two vases to see the Buddha. The Buddha told him to "put down" as soon as he met him, and the Brahmin put down the vase in his left hand.
Buddha told him to "put it down" again, and he put down the vase in his right hand.
however, the Buddha said, "put it down!"
Brahmen was puzzled: "I am empty-handed. What do you want me to put down?"
the Buddha said, "I'm not asking you to put down the vase, I'm asking you to put down the six worries."
do not easily complain about the injustice of fate, in fact, life is the same for everyone.
what kind of mentality determines what kind of state of life you have.
most of the troubles are because they expect too much, so they think about it all the time, but they don't want it all the time.
it is difficult for people who are trapped in their own demons to climb out.
there is a long way to go in life, nothing is impassable, some people and things can only be edited, can not last forever.
the most important thing a person should pursue in this life is happiness. Only by making himself happy can life be lovely.
-04-
A young man complained of his inner pain to a superior man.
"when you grow up, you won't suffer any more." The master said.
"but I have grown up." The young man answered.
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"by growing up, you mean increasing age. I'm talking about inner growth and maturity." The master said.
"We all know that ripe fruit is sweet, so cutting through the heart is solid, while green and immature fruit is bitter, so the heart is empty."
the same is true of a person. When his heart is full, he is a happy person, a happy person with a sweet heart.
on the road of life, there is less success and more rebellion.
less grief, more satisfaction; less expectation, more indifference.
the ancients used to say that no desire is just.
means that if a person does not have any desire, he is not afraid of anything, he does not have to be afraid of anything.
in the second half of life, remember three words: forget it; put it down; forget it.
No matter how deep the relationship is, there must be a bottom line, and no matter how good the temper is, there must be dignity.
instead of struggling in someone else's world, it is better to find a new habitat for a proud heart.
the worries you used to look forward to day and night can be put aside, and you don't have to stay awake at night waiting for a piece of news.
from now on, the courtship that has been made so painstakingly can be withdrawn, and there is no need to deny yourself because of the indifference of others.
learn to give up and learn to look down on all the good and bad.
over time, happiness will become a new habit, and you will only live more calmly.
so that's it, less expectation, less dependence, less prosperity, come and go chic.
May all your gains and losses be all right, and live coolly and warmly.